http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A36I4L31Hzc
This song and video I've been listening to the past week or so. The lyrics caught me off hand, and very musch so, describe the position I am in at the moment. The song talks about being in a place of complete hopelessness, brokeness, and anger. I feel the artist is talking about how much he is striving for Christ but feels like he does not deserve to find him. He feels like nothing he does in this life is good enough or will mean a thing when he is gone. This feeling that nothing will matter when it's over reminds me of Ecclesiastes 9:5-6.
"The living at least know they will die, but the dead know nothing. They have no further reward, nor are they remembered. Whatever they did in their lifetime - loving, hating, envying - is all long gone. They no longer play a part in anything here on earth."
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